Chapter 1

She felt the cold steel in her hands.

"Do it!Shoot!"said Kurtis.She targeted him "You know you don't want to"he said and gave her a smile

"You'll be surprised to find out what I want"she replied and half smiled at him 'How did it get this far?'she thouth

Well that's a long story.Ever since she knew Kurtis she felt something...No!Not love!...of course not!

He called her a few days ago and demanded a meeting.

"I want to see you"he said

"For what purpose exactly?"she asked

"Just be there"

She met him at a cafe.

"So what now?"she asked as she sat o a chair opposite Kurtis

"Don't be that way,sunshine"she scowled at him.That minute she saw a man with dark glasses,he targeted a gun directly at her head.

"Friend of yours?"she asked with a smile and pointed at him.Kurtis turned around,surprised.

"No!H*ll no!"he said,grabbed Lara and ran at a deserted building.

"What do you think you're doing?"she asked jumped of him and kicked him in the face...lightly!He laughed.Gunfire broke a window.

"Get down!"she yelled.He did so.

"We have to get out of here"she whispered and went next to the window using her stealth.She got her guns,made a flip and shot a mercenarie.

'"What are you looking at?"she asked and shot some more of them.They quickly ran out of the back entrance.Lara hopped on Kurtis' motorcucle,he sat behind her.Lara drove to the Manor.She pushed him on a sofa.

"What are you trying to do Kurtis?Kill me?"she yelled angryly

"No!I don't know those guys"

"They were obviously after you"said Lara and targeted him

"I'm not sure about that"

"I think you should leave,Kurtis.Call me when you figure it out"she said and went up the stairs to her room.She shut the door.

"Oh,God!"she just said and got in her pajamas.She lay on the bed and closed her eyes.

"Women"said Kurtis,got out and drove off.Lara smiled when she heard his motorcycle.

He called her again two days after that,saying that he knows everything.

"You have to meet me again.I know who they are and why they want to kill me"

"Yeah if you say so"she said sarcasticly.They met at the same deserted bulding

"Is that building symbolic or something?"she asked and laughed

"The person that tried to kill me is my ex-girlfriend"

"You've got to be kidding me!" He was about to respond when a bullet flew 3 inches from Lara's head.She sighed,got her guns and and got rid of the mercenaries.She jumped over the bodies and targeted Kurtis.And that's how it got this far...

"I'm sure you have something to do with this,Kurtis!If they were after you why try to kill me?"

"She's over possesive"

"What?She's jealous?No way!There's nothing going on between us!"

"Oh,really?And how do you call that?"he asked and kissed her.She dropped her guns on the floor.After a few seconds she pushed him away.

"Jerk!"she said and went out.Kurtis smiled "You liked that didn't you?"he whispered

Lara got home.

"Zip?"she called

"Lara!You're back!"he greated her with a hug

"Zip!Something really strange happened!Kurtis told me who's after him and you're not gonna believe this!It's his ex-girlfriend!Appearantly she thinks that there's something going on between him and me.I told him that's riduculous and he kissed me!"At the last Zip dropped his cellphone on the phone.Alister entered the room.

"Hey,Lara!How are you?"She was about to respond when Zip said:

"Kurtis kissed Lara!"

"He did what?"

'Did you have to say it that way?"asked Lara and went in her room,gigling like an embarassed teenager.

"Strange"said Alister and looked worriedly in Lara's direction.

'Is something going on between them?'he thoth and shrugged

"Women.Go figure"Zip nodded

"What's going on?When Kurtis kissed me I felt butterflies in my stomack...oh,h*ll no!"she said and decided to train a little it had to get Kurtis out of her mind.She did some flips and some swings with the grapple'She smiled as she saw a flashback of the first kiss Kurtis gave her.They were running from their enemies.It was raining.He pinned her on a wall and gave her a qick kiss.After that he continued running.Lara froze.

"For Christ sakes,Lara!What are you waiting for?Run!"he yelled.She did so and smiled.She smiled now too.

"Thinking of me?"asked Kurtis

"Don't flatter yourself...what are you doing here?"

"I missed you"she once again dropped her guns on the floor

"What?What are you talking about?"she asked,amazed

"What you heard,sunshine"She swalloed 'Oh,God!He missed me!And what's up with my stomack again?'she thouth

------Sooo tell me what you think you may critisise------

The premise is simple but pretty effective. As it happens, your story turns out far too much like a screenplay. Focus on using more descriptives intstead of flooding your story with dialougue. Also, ensure your grammar, paragraphing and punctuation marks are used properly. If attempting fanfiction, try and write is as you would a school essay assignment - use basic skills as a jump-off point. This makes it far easier to read and understand. Also, make each character's dialogue distinctly theirs - you should be able to tell that A not B is speaking simply from the tone and content of the dialogue.

The premise is simple but pretty effective. As it happens, your story turns out far too much like a screenplay. Focus on using more descriptives intstead of flooding your story with dialougue. Also, ensure your grammar, paragraphing and punctuation marks are used properly. If attempting fanfiction, try and write is as you would a school essay assignment - use basic skills as a jump-off point. This makes it far easier to read and understand. Also, make each character's dialogue distinctly theirs - you should be able to tell that A not B is speaking simply from the tone and content of the dialogue.

ok,erm I'll try to work on the things you said,but I didn't quite get if you like it or not

Sorry about that. Yeah, Id say I quite like it! It's a good idea, elaborating on the interaction between Kurtis, Lara and Zip.

Chapter 2

"You,silly!You and I can't get together!"

"Well why not?"

"You know why"

"I don't know...why don't you tell me?"

"We have to many differences"

"Opposites attract"

"Not in our case"

"You're such a cowardly woman"

"What did you just say?"

"You heard me"

"I have fought things you can't imagine and you call me cowardly?"

"The truth hurts,baby" Lara raged almost as the beasts in Annivercary...and Kurtis couldn't do the adrenaline dodge

"You'd better apologize if you know what's good for you" She got her guns

"Violence is not the answer"

"Shut up!Say you're sorry!Now!"

"No.Make me I dare you" She kissed him and left.Poor Kurtis didn't know why.

As she drove off she said:

"Why didn't I just shoot him?"

Lara went in the Manor and found it empty.

"Zip?Alister?Winston?Are you here?" She shouted and waited for a reply,but didn't hear anything.Lara went in the library and found all the books on the floor.

"Alister would never leave it that way" She decided to check if Zip's in the manor.She found all his computers shut down.

"No way!What happened?Were they kidnapped?" Lara went in her room and found a note on her bed.

"Ms.Croft,something really strange happened.Zip and Alister are nowhere to be found.I fear they might have been..." here the handwriting was unreadable.There was something else written.

"I have them all.Come alone you know were to find me.

Black Shadow"

"Oh no!"

Writer's Note: Christina Smith a.k.a. Black Shadow is the villain in my story you'll find out more about her in the next chapter.

no readers?bump...