Finally!

Although I don't know if anyone except Gia and Boaz were actually anticipating this

OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMER:

I like Tomb Raider: Legend. I'll openly bash Angel of Darkness throughout the thread. Get over it.*

OBLIGATORY EXPLANATION:

Although this is the third of the "SAA" series, there's probably someone out there in LCO land that doesn't know wtf. The "SAA" series is pretty much me playing whatever TR I feel like playing, and chronicling it with screenshots, usually with (hopefully) funny comments at the bottom. The first was TR4, second was TR:C, and now....oh dear god....I'm playing TR:AoD. Enjoy!

I would get an obligitory chest shot, but that would require me to move AoD Lara around more than I have to, and no one wants to do that. **

I'm French, I'm French, listen to my oh so overly-thick French accent that's believable for all of five seconds!

That's a....different way of starting the game. Considering you probably skipped over the cutscene that was in "current times" to get to the menu screen.

What kind of idiot remarks this about a garbage bin?! Of course it's climbable, you moron!

It looks like grandma forgot to pick up her medicine! Is Lara going to be all good semeritan and ring the doorbell?

• Ripping the guts out of a bumbling fool
• Stealing grandma's medicine

• Ripping the guts out of a bumbling fool
• Stealing grandma's medicine
• Breaking and entering

At first I thought this was a typo, but Jonell actually said it. Then I figured out that it's some crazy brit way of saying "pry".

Jeez, woman! You went to, like, five different private schools! You have parents with more money than God! Why can't you form a simple sentence correctly?!

So, in retrospect, you'd have to either jump three rooftops or go up a bajillion flights of stairs to get a gun that doesn't even have ammo in it. I don't see how anyone found this useful.

Yes, it's always intellegent to return to a place you just broke into and practically ripped apart.

• Ripping the guts out of a bumbling fool
• Stealing grandma's medicine
• Breaking and entering
• Robbery

Announce it to the world while you're running from the cops, yes! This isn't insane at all!

• Ripping the guts out of a bumbling fool
• Stealing grandma's medicine
• Breaking and entering
• Robbery
• Murder (I'll only count this once, since she apparently finds it apt to do it over and over again)

*Okay, so I kinda like AoD, too.

**:Except TRF

An AoD playthrough thread, excellent (this game drove me absolutely crazy, I don't know why I love it so...)

So, in retrospect, you'd have to either jump three rooftops or go up a bajillion flights of stairs to get a gun that doesn't even have ammo in it. I don't see how anyone found this useful

The first time I played AoD, it was on a Pentium 3 with 4MB of integrated graphics, so I couldn't actually see what was going on in the game terribly well. When I got to this part, I exclaimed "Hey, Lara found a paint roller!" My best friend came over to see what on earth Lara could possibly want with a paint roller, so we looked in her inventory and I found out it was just a gun.

Prize can mean capturing and seizing...so...I dunno if she wants to seize the door, but hey she's just a little weird in this game. Also, I could never tell if she was murdering people she grappled with, or just knocked them out...it's all a bit of a mystery to me lol, like the stun gun for example.

Still, totally awesome, I can't wait until part 2!

MsC

Awesome job with this thread. Although I'll be the first to say in here that when I first got this game and played it, it took me only a week to complete it. Considering the many flaws this game had....the hardest part for me was the Hall of Seasons, believe it or not.

Anyway, I too can't wait to see part 2 of this thread.

Prize can mean capturing and seizing...so...I dunno if she wants to seize the door, but hey she's just a little weird in this game. Also, I could never tell if she was murdering people she grappled with, or just knocked them out...it's all a bit of a mystery to me lol, like the stun gun for example.

Still, totally awesome, I can't wait until part 2!

MsC

I took it that they meant 'prise' (it can be spelt with a z) which means to lever something open.

Anyways - it's looking good jnr

I FORGOT THE MOST IMPORTANT PART! (No, not the chest shot, you pervs)

DERELICT APT. BLOCK

a.k.a: Police out of nowhere!

Lara nearly gets her head popped open by the police, escapes into a direlict building, and calmly walks upward. My guess is that Lara's new to this "running from the government" thing.*

So, there was a random concrete boulder hanging precariously on the roof? derelict indeed. Hell, that doesn't even make sense.

INDUSTRIAL ROOFTOPS

a.k.a: Running on slick metal without getting a concussion!

Okay, so Mr.IneptHelicopterGuy has a clear shot at her, and she's moving extremely slowly on a slick telephone wire. How this level got past the 00:00:05 mark is beyond m--

Never mind.

Why are th--? How? Oh, I give up. The bandages are relatively pointless anyway.

Okay, all I see is a big empty room with some horribly textured block on the bottom. What exactly was this "warehouse" used for, again?

Lara obviously has been spending too much time around Larson. That or she takes grammar lessons from Scarlett O'Hara.

Ooh, doggy!

Although Lara's Soap Opera-easque "AUAUGHUHNH!!!!!" makes it okay. **

So to wrap up the night, Lara's [supposedly] murdered some creepy old geezer in a needlessly extravagant way (RIPPING THE IRON OUT OF HIS BLOOD), barely evaded the cops, robbed some poor sap's home, nearly got a shriveled lung from some unknown green substance, somehow managed to run on slick metal, and jumped ten stories down face first into a massive garbage bin.

...

Damn Lara knows how to party.

*:I would mention Nevada, here, or London for that matter, but no. No. That's Tomb Raider III. That game was awful. Which means: GUESS WHAT GAME I'LL SAA-IFY NEXT!?!

**:I find enjoyment out of every time AoD Lara dies. ^-^

Yay! VCJ's playthrough is back! Thought of making one of TRL next?

I'm surprised you got a good screenie when Lara was looking up- I usually get the eyes-inside-Lara's-head bit. Scary!

Damn Lara knows how to party.

Wow, Lara's quite the career criminal,isn't she?

Although Lara's Soap Opera-easque "AUAUGHUHNH!!!!!" makes it okay.

Mwa ha ha, gotta love Lara's groans when she keels over dead

Great stuff, keep it coming

Yay VCJ!

I love your playthroughs!

I enjoy these every time, they really brighten my day

CARVIER'S APT.

a.k.a I think someone needs a nap...

So, the murder happened, what, twenty minutes ago? How does Carvier (stupid French last names, I used to pronounce it "Car-vee-air" before I played the game) know about it already? Oh AoD plotholes, you do make me laugh!

Temper tantrum in:

3....

2...

1...

Wow.

That's right Lara, after getting on the woman's bad side, feel free to rob her.

PERSIAN GHETTO (Pt. 1):

a.k.a Lar' gon' get shanked

"Now I know how a bum must feel..."*

Oh Lara, you sick, sick kleptomaniac. Also, who would even consider eating an opened chocolate bar laying in the dirt? What is she, five?

I'm guessing he doesn't get much buisness, considering you have to climb on top of a train, scale a mesh fence, and jump like a Gazel twice in a row to even get close to the platform he's on.

Since there are so many people around to hear us and all. **

I wouldn't want to sleep with a guy that has a face that looks like it got caved in by a blunt baseball bat to the face. But then again, this is AoD Lara so who knows.

How Lara got information of The Sleeper from some horny chav I'll never know. What I do know is that Werner's Journal never updated past this point. Glitches.

Hmm. I wonder why a bundle of Euros would be on a doorstep? Maybe some poor chap just dropped it carelessly? Maybe (probably, considering the location), it's drug money. Yes, very intelligent thing you did there, Lara, stealing from a drug dealer.

Ooh, burn!

Yes, Tomb Raider, you're so edgy by making a nonchalant sexual reference. Not to mention that your protagonist is a sex symbol.

Calm down KTEB'rs, or I might have to get my boomstick.

No arm movement whatsoever! Animation at its finest!

Huh, somewhere I think I remember hearing that Lara "only plays for sport". I'm probably crazy, though. ***

This followed the last comment. How exactly could that even start to be taken as a joke?! About the Monstrum no less!

Pssht, who needs proper punctuation, right, Core?

*: So...the commuters just /ignored/ the passed out woman that smells like blood and wet sewage all night? Of course, I think people ride the city bus like that every day. :S

**: How can one "die pretty"? That's disturbing beyond belief.

***:*sigh* I know some moron's going to come in all "That was TR1!!!" Yes, yes, I know this. And I'll pop you because you don't get sarcasm.

"Now I know how a bum must feel..."*

See now, why did Lara sleep on the floor with her face in what looks like a very dodgy puddle, instead of on, I don't know, maybe those handy seats off to the sides there?

Who knows, maybe she did sleep on the benches but fell off while sleeping.

LOL, yeah, although falling face-first into a dirty puddle would wake most people up. Perhaps she had a go at that bottle of rare vintage cognac she nicked from Carvier's place

Or maybe Core was just feeling lazy and didn't make the animation of her sleeping on a bench...

Looking forward to the next levels, VCJ!

Or maybe Core was just feeling lazy and didn't make the animation of her sleeping on a bench...

Oh sure, spoil our brilliant theories with your logic

Hmm. I wonder why a bundle of Euros would be on a doorstep? Maybe some poor chap just dropped it carelessly? Maybe (probably, considering the location), it's drug money. Yes, very intelligent thing you did there, Lara, stealing from a drug dealer.

You know, I think I may just go visit Paris and see if I can find any of these magical replenishing piles of money lying around

OH OH OH Let me know if you find any!!!!

Persian Ghetto (pt. 2)

a.k.a Not Part 1

Useless trivia time!

There are posters like these all over the level, and those names in big print are the names of programmers, level designers (DIE), etc.

I'm flattered.

It's just completely pointless bringing this up anymore. *sigh*

So, she steals a wedding ring from a church. Well. Ain't that special.

Eternal damnation ahoy!

I bet Lara'd like to be in the bike's pos--NO I CAN"T SAY IT! *gag*

Who literally flushes money down the toilet?! Crazy French.

Le Serpent Rouge

The most awful video game music you'll ever hear

Yay, our second kill!

Yes Lara, pick the box of pills up off the French dance club's floor. This is completely acceptable and you won't black out at all!

"Ooh, I wonder what this switch do---OH GOD MY EARS TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF!!!"

Lara's arch-enemy: the box.*

I would note how difficult this jump can be, but then again, she's jumping onto an oscillating light ficture instead of, I don't know, taking the stairs

**

Yep, one of AoD's puzzles is changing a lightbulb. Height of action/adventure, you bet!

If you find this, you better find the ticket office, because Lara won't part with this thing for some reason if you don't use it. I still have it currently, in Vault of the Lux Varitatis.

*:It took up to fifteen tries for her to actually get on top of the thing since some genious at Core decided not to let Lara simply climb up onto a waist high box.

**:Although it's also an option that she's commiting suicide since she knows her game is going down the tubes at an alarming rate. This is the most likely option.

Great stuff

Useless trivia time!

There are posters like these all over the level, and those names in big print are the names of programmers, level designers (DIE), etc

I knew that already, because I am a gigantic Tomb Raider nerd...

"Ooh, I wonder what this switch do---OH GOD MY EARS TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF!!!"

Yes, yes, exactly what I first thought when I heard that song.

I knew that already, because I am a gigantic Tomb Raider nerd...

Gah!! I didn't know that, I wanna be a TR nerd too!

really entertaining to read, ive still never played through AOD only got up to the train bit and the demo ran out of time. ill probly get it at some point though

Really sorry about the lack of updates lately, It's just been on the back of my mind. *

Anyway:

St. Aicard's Graveyard

Woah, what's the rent on an apartment over here, a handful of jellybeans?

Okay, so Pierre and whatsherface broke up and she proceeded to get an apartment within looking distance of her ex's cafe. I think all the scorned lovers will agree with me when I say:

What were you thinking?!

Lara, it's bad enough that she has to live above a graveyard and across from her ex's shop, you don't have to rob her.**

*sigh* Maybe if I don't say anything we can have a nice stroll across a surface for once.

*walk walk wa---OHGODRUNNONONO!*

....I wouldn't want to live in an apartment with a walkway that could crumble and topple onto me at any given moment.

Yes, when dogs come up to me I pull out a gun and shoot them.

Lara is one cold lady. :S

You can just cut the irony with a knife!

This would look hilarious to a bystander. Lara's just strolling through a graveyard (which is weird enough) and proceeds to bash in a tomb's door, pick up an item and walk out calmly.

....It doesn't help that this is the aforementioned item.

No, this isn't Core trying to be edgy at all. I mean, it's only a goth running from the law with blood on her hands tipping over a statue of an angel.

*:Let's just say that the days of screenshot based threads may be getting shorter and shorter.

**:But I guess she deserves it; she's just staring at the wall and everything while a stranger working for her ex walks around her apartment. :S

hey whatever happened to this thread? ive played through AOD now that was rubbish lol

hey whatever happened to this thread? ive played through AOD now that was rubbish lol

Well, no one posted after the update two posts up so I saw no point in continuing. I'd gladly pick it up again if people regain interest, though.

Oh, and by the way, if I do pick this up, it will most definitely end with a few Boaz shots. There is no way I'm dealing with that...thing again. Bah. Bah, I say.

Edited January 23, 200818 yr by VonCroyJr.

Hey I just started reading this and I think it's great! It is so funny! Please keep it up!